Yaponomics
This time last year, one of my siblings lost their ever loving mind and barfed vitriol in my Facebook messages asking, among many other unhinged questions, if I “suffered from TDS.” I responded only to say that I’d opened and read the messages, offering no response to any of their questions.
You see, having been steeped in the same tea, so to speak, I know that what they wanted is a fight. There was no such thing as civil discourse encouraged by our mother; narcissists thrive on their children squabbling amongst each other and choosing who’s golden, and who’s the current outcast.
Today, that same sibling reached out via text asking if all my siblings are blocked. They’re not. I don’t block people from contacting me unless they’ve really gone too far and called me my mother or, talked shit about me at work. Not even my abuser is blocked, he can witness me thrive from the sidelines. It brings me far more joy knowing someone, somewhere, who has fucked around, is finding out.
Do I miss my sisters? I miss who they pretended to be when they wanted me on their team. But, do I? They were often cruel, mean spirited, and dismissive. Tucking my boldness, free spirit, and precocity away in a file labeled “to be quashed.”
Silence may be golden, my indifference is everlasting.
